Sunday 10 October 2010

Hijab and Fashion

Assalaamu Aleykum Warahmatulallah

My dear sisters please keep this hadith in mind when you think of fashion insha Allah

"Wretched is the slave of the dinar, dirham and fancy clothes of velvet and silk! If he is given, he is pleased, and if he is not given, he is displeased."

Friday 13 August 2010

Ramadan Mubarak

So here is the month long awaited, Alhamdulillah I really do feel the peace inside and such a satisfaction of sacrifice for my Creator, Allah swt!!!

May it be a month of blessings for you all insha Allah

Friday 16 July 2010

The Ill Effects of Televison


Taken from here

The Ill Effects of Television

By Abu Mohammed Abdur-Rauf Shakir

Introduction

The great need for discussion of the Islamic perspective concerning the issue of television is clear to us all. Since television has entered the homes of people in every corner of the earth, the rich and the poor, the educated and un-educated, Muslim and non-Muslim – it has become a necessity to address the issue and explain the problems and dangers of television in a clear concise manner for the benefit of every Muslim who is seeking to please Allah, the Most High, and earn His reward.

The Definition of Television

The Encyclopaedia Britannica defines television as follows:

The electrical transmission of pictures in motion and the simultaneous electrical transmission of the accompanying sound.

The Encyclopaedia International explains television as:

The unique feature that distinguishes television from radio is the conversion of an image into an electrical current, which is later reconverted into the original image…

The Working of Television

The equipment consists of a camera, which converts the image into electrical impulses; these are transmitted by radio to a receiver which converts the impulses by means of a cathode-ray tube into a corresponding image on the screen.

The Image

The illusion of motion in television is produced by showing 30 still pictures, or frames, each second. Through persistence of vision the brain retains each picture until the next comes along. We are not aware of the fact that our eyes are really seeing a rapidly changing sequence of a large number of slightly different still pictures. Each still picture consists of about 250 000 picture dots of varying brightness which appear as if painted on the screen. This process is called scanning.

[Encyclopaedia International]2

It should at this juncture be said that the undesirability and the Islamic prohibition of this institution of television is not based solely on the stand that photography (picture-making) of animate objects is employed. Without minimizing the importance and the decisiveness of the prohibitory factor of picture-making it has to be said that a number of other evil and un-Islamic factors accompany the institution of television. It is this conglomeration of evil factors which make television illegal in Islam although, in most cases, each single one of these factors is sufficient to secure the verdict of illegality of TV. Insha'Allah, we shall outline these prohibitory factors (Asbaabul Hurmat) of television in the ensuing pages.

Picture-Making – The Mother of Television

Photography which is merely a method of picture-making is the actual basis of TV. Without the institution of photography television is not possible. Whether shows are" live" or otherwise, the institution of photography is employed. Now, according to the Law of Islam picture-making of animate objects is severely criticised and banned.

Music and Television

We can consider music as an integral part of television programs. No TV show is complete without music. Islam has forbidden music in no unmistaken terms.3 For the purposes of the present subject it will suffice to state that Islam categorically forbids all types of music. Music in Islam is regarded as a Kabirah (great) sin. With regard to music our Prophet (saws) said:

"There will be men from among my Ummah who will consume alcohol, giving it another name (so as to deceive themselves and others). Singing girls and musical instruments will be playing to them. Allah, Ta'ala will cause the earth to swallow them. Allah will transform them into apes and swine."4

Ibn Maajah

It is reported from Abdullah ibn Mas'ood (May Allah be pleased with him):

"Music shows hypocrisy in the heart like water causes seeds to grow in soil."5

Ad-Durru al-Manthoor

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"And when they (the believers) hear what is futile they turn away from it, and they say, Unto us our deeds; and unto you your deeds. Peace be upon you. We do not follow the ignorant ones."
[Qur'an Al-Qasas 28:55]

The Female Voice

The female voice, according to Islam, is also included in the category of Satar, ie. it has to be 'concealed' and not 'revealed'. Since the female voice is an entity not to be displayed or advertised, it is not permissible for males to listen to women singing or even reciting the Qur'an…

When necessity demands that they have to speak to males then their speech should not be attractive, gentle and alluring like the deliberate 'lure' put in speech by 'trained' women of the disbelievers. Recognising the danger of allurement in the female voice, the Qur'an commands women thus:

"And do not speak in alluring tones so that he in whose heart there is a disease (of lust) desires."
[Qur'an al-Ahzab 33:32]

Van de Velde in his book Ideal Marriage, states:

"The tone-colour of a voice, and the intonation of a single word – and it may be a word of no special meaning or association in itself – may excite incredible intensity of desire. The unique and precious significance that a woman's voice can give to "you" can suffice to overwhelm man's power of endurance and control…"

Islam has, hence, forbidden its women to speak in a soft or "sexually" sweet tone. If anyone is aware of the springs of sex-psychology he will clearly see the justification for Islam's restriction in this matter.

The importance of television programs, like the importance of all the mass media of the disbelievers, hinges on maximum exhibition of the female body and the female voice which have been subverted by the bestial culture of the unbelievers, to pamper the inordinate sexual desires of men who have no belief of Allah in them – of men who have no fear of Allah left in them.

Serials, Romances and Stories on Television

What is Islam's attitude to fiction, novels and romantic stories? Allah Ta'ala says in the Qur'an:

"And among mankind are those who purchase idle tales (lahwu'l-hadith) so as to lead astray (others)
from the Path of Allah. And, they make a mockery of the Laws of Allah.
To them, there is a disgraceful punishment. And, when our verses are rehearsed
they turn away in pride as if they did not hear,
as if there are plugs in their ears. Give them the news of a painful punishment."
[Qur'an Luqman 31:6,7]

These verses of the Qur'an were revealed to prohibit, according to the Mufassireen and Jurists, music and the stories of romances imported from Persia. Since these things divert man's attention from the remembrance of Allah and transport one into the realm of illusion and imagination the Qur'an outlaws them. Islam strongly discourages fiction and encourages one to live in reality and not in illusion which has the tendency to make one negligent and forgetful of the prime purpose of man's creation which is to gain Allah's Pleasure by fixing the gaze on the Akhirat (Hereafter) and not on the TV screen. Islam, therefore forbids the wasting of time in listening to idle tales and fiction or false stories.

Nudity, Immorality and Television

The most glaring evil propagated by the television media of the world is the crime of nudity and sexual immorality. Commercialised nudity and sexual immorality under the camouflage of "educational" pictures are accepted and necessary features of the world of television. The Western world is haunted by the obsession of illicit sex, and it is this carnal obsession of illicit sex coupled with the unbeliever's god of materialism, which makes capital of the female body on TV as well as all other mass media.

The Islamic concept of morality and modesty is the very antithesis of the immorality and lascivity dished out to the world via TV. Islam demands the concealment of the female body. The Messenger of Allah (saws) said:

"Woman is an object of concealment."6

At-Tirmidhee

TV is an institution, which is widely used to exhibit the female body. Islam has banned all forms of immorality and immodesty, but TV exhibits immodesty and immorality in their crudest forms by depicting the actual sex acts and, above all, it audaciously and shamelessly passes these off as "educational". Television as a prime agent of immorality is very well known…

The Messenger of Allah (saws) said:

"Shamelessness (immodesty) is vice, and vice will be in the fire."7

Muslim

Television As An Agent of Zina (Fornication)

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"And come not near to zina."
[Qur'an Al-Isra 17:32]

The term, come not near, means stay away from all such things and practices which lead to zina – which are stepping-stones to fornication.

All practices, things and institutions which aid and foster fornication and immodesty are forbidden by Islam. There are different categories of this abominable crime of zina. The Messenger of Allah T said:

"The zina of the eyes is the gaze (at that which is unlawful, eg. Nudity); the zina of the ears is to listen (to talks of nudity which excites the carnal desire); the zina of the tongue is to speak (what is evil); the zina of the hand is to touch (the female which is unlawful to you); the zina of the feet is to walk (towards immorality); the zina of the heart is to desire (what is unlawful), and it is the private parts which either commits or shuns the actual act of fornication." 8

Muslim

In this hadith the Messenger of Allah speaks of the zina committed by the various parts of the human body. Thus to look at the nudity and evil portrayed on the television screen constitutes the zina of the eyes. To listen to the immodest and illicit sex talks of the television is zina of the ears. Lust which is aroused by the display, discussion of nudity and lascivity and perversion on the TV screen constitutes the zina of the heart.

Television, therefore, is without any doubt a powerful agent and a stepping-stone for fornication…

We find today the whole family – father, mother, sons and daughters – sitting huddled together around the TV screen. Together, in a display of stark shamelessness, the whole family is committing zina of the eyes, zina of the ears and zina of the heart, and Allah alone knows how many multitudes of men and women indulged in the final act of fornication as a result of watching and being aroused by the evil on the TV screen…

Islam lays great emphasis on modesty, so much so, that our Prophet (saws) said:

"Modesty is a part of Iman (Faith)."9

At-Tirmidhee

But TV with its emphasis on illicit, depraved and bestial immorality is the very negation of the Islamic concept of modesty and shame. Mother, father and children together viewing the zina – the fornication and vice on the TV screen. What is now left of humanity? May Allah Ta'ala protect us and our children from the filth and depravity of the Western world sunk in perversion and immorality.

Allah says:

"Today (the Day of Qiyamh) we shall seal their mouths – and, their hands shall speak
(the evil they committed); and their feet will bear evidence as to what they practiced."
[Qur'an Ya-Sin 36:65]

TV in Stride – Terror of Copy Rapes

The horror of a TV rape came true for two women. They were attacked only days after the screening of a documentary "Cry Rape" on British TV.

The maniac who broke into their homes at Reading, Berkshire, acted just like the TV rapist.

He struck by day, threatening his victims with a knife. He robbed them and stacked his lot in a neat pile ready for a quick getaway. The police chief leading the hunt for the rapist said: "He may have seen this program. It could have stimulated these attacks." Now police may ask ITV for a private screening of the film to seek possible new clues.

Sunday Times, 8th February, 1976

Television and Crime in General

Television besides being a powerful agent of immorality generally fosters various types of crime. Violence, aggression, robberies, murder, etc, are crimes, which the young readily learn from TV shows. Much of the delinquency and youth crimes being perpetrated in the Western world could be traced to the TV.

In an article entitled: TV Shows Blamed For Crimes, Los Angeles judge, Mark Brandler, blasted a TV crime show recently as the cause of a "seven-hour nightmare" in which two teenagers taped shotguns to the heads of hostages and extracted a huge ransom from a Californian bank.

Television Encourages Acceptance of Aggression

The regular and continuous shows of violence and aggression slowly, but most certainly, claim their victims. Viewers are 'brain washed' by the perpetual scenes of violence to such an extent that violence and aggressiveness becomes accepted as a mode of behaviour.

Television Encourages Imitation of Crime

Research has established that TV exercised a very strong influence on the minds of people causing them to imitate and enact the crime shown on the TV screen. Dr. Robert Liebert, a child psychologist who was a leading researcher in the United States Surgeon General's investigation into TV and social behaviour, says: Violence on home screens encourages 'an acceptance of aggression as a mode of behaviour…Perfectly normal children will imitate anti-social behaviour they see on television, not out of malice, but curiosity…In showing displays of violence and criminal acts, the media is 'teaching', people are 'learning', he says.

The Brainwashing Action of Television

Television is here and its biggest fans are children. Overnight they've become instant pundits, immediately recognising personalities who are still just faces to the rest of us.

It's the kids who grab the TV guide and plot their viewing with military precision; the kids who know every cop and cowboy and exactly why it could not have been the butler who did it.

Will reading become a forgotten art only necessary to decipher the basic English of the TV guide or the secret message flashed on the screen by Agent X who has seconds to read the scrawl before it self destructs?

Researchers have established that the young minds of children are readily susceptible to being brainwashed by TV. In America organisations have been formed in scores of cities in order to fight the evil effect of TV on children. The President of the Organisation, Action For Children's Television, a Boston-based parents' organisation with branches in 60 cities says:

"At present, from Monday to Friday, children are subjected to 16 minutes of commercials an hour, and 12 minutes an hour on weekends."

"Television advertisers in America are pouring unprecedented millions of dollars into the child slots for the autumn season, despite a storm of public indignation over 'brainwashing' on children's shows."

Television Stunts Intellectual Growth

An eminent American educationalist, Professor Lowell Little, claims that TV raises ignorant students. At an education seminar in Florida he said:

"Today's youth are so used to plopping down in front of a television set and not having to put their brains to work that when they come to sit in a classroom of a university all they are capable of doing is day-dreaming and vacantly watching the clock."

"As the first generation of youngsters all but raised on television has now reached college age it is abundantly clear that the boob tube (ie. Television) has destroyed any curiosity they may ever have had."

"Their level of communication is just at the sixth grade level."

"Television has more influence on them than parents, teachers or clergy – and that is a disgrace."

"If I get through to four students out of 30 and arouse their interest that's the best I can expect."

The Addictive Influence of Television

The addictive influence of TV over its viewers is a serious malady, which has reached alarming proportions. Viewers become so addicted to TV that it becomes most difficult for most viewers to live without TV. Research in this field of the 'addictive influence of TV' has established that if those who are addicted to TV are deprived of television they became increasingly nervous, short-tempered and unhappy.

In an article captioned: Millions Addicted To The Box, the Eastern Province Herald of the 23rd October, 1975, reports:

"Television's addictive grip was emphasised some months before when three socially varied 'guinea pig' families agreed to try a switch-off for a month. The lowest income family could stand the deprivation only a week; the other two lasted for four weeks, hating every minute of it. They said they felt as if they had lost a friend, were depressed and thought their work was suffering too."

"In an earlier psychological experiment 185 West Germans volunteered to try to give up television for a year, with the inducement of payment as long as they kept off. One brave family stood the strain for nearly six months – till they wanted to watch a crime serial. The first volunteer, a bachelor; failed after three weeks. Others became increasingly nervous, short-tempered and unhappy…"

Television Diverts Man's Attention from the Remembrance of Allah

The Prophet (saws) said:

"Every sport or amusement that a Muslim occupies himself with is Baatil (baseless, null and not permissible) – except three [the three types being] his practicing with your bow (and arrow); his training horse and his playing with his family."10

Ibn Maajah

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"The Life of this world is but play and amusement,
and the abode of the Hereafter is best for those who fear (Allah)."
[Qur'an Al-An'am 6:32]

The above stated Hadith and verse of the Qur'an, as well as many other verses of the Qur'an and Ahadith make it quite clear that Islam does not tolerate futility, idle sport and amusement. This is so because amusement and entertainment divert one's attention from the remembrance of Allah Ta'ala. It also interferes with one's worship causing neglect of Salaat (in general) and the congregational prayers (particularly for the men). Amusement and entertainment which Islam describes as Lawh, la'b make a person indolent, negligent and irresponsible. Hence, we find the Messenger of Allah T condemning very strongly even such play as chess and backgammon etc., in the following hadith:

"Whosoever plays with chess and backgammon is like one who has dyed his hand with the flesh and blood of swine."11

Muslim

Research on Television has shown…

Research studies on the effects and influence of television on society has shown that:

The average American child stares at more than 11, 000 murders on television by the age of 14.
Most American children spend more time before a set than with their teacher in any one year.
In a national survey many young viewers claimed to watch television for up to 46 hours a week.
Television takes one away from reality.
TV has created a "vast tribe of mini-stars, pop-idols, schmaltzy gurus, talking-heads, telegogues and cardboard 'personalities'" whose only achievement is to be on the box.
TV causes lethargy in children.
Television is responsible for the falling standard of literacy.
Millions of dollars are spent by advertisers to 'brainwash' children by means of television to increase demand for consumer goods.
Television makes viewers insensitive to violence perpetrated by others.
Public apathy and failure to respond to a victim's cries for help is blamed on television.
Television is detrimental to the physical and mental health of children…
What They Say About Television

"The Church of England General Synod, in a report to a Government appointed committee deplores scenes of heavy drinking, chain smoking and casual use of obscene language and blasphemous language on TV."Eastern Province Herald, 23rd October, 1975

The psychiatrists, Dr William Tompkins of the George Washington School of Medicine, and Dr Paul Fink of the East Virginia Medical School, have been engaged in intensive research into the effect on people of television advertising. They say that during commercials "encourage belief in mysticism by making viewers believe they can get what they want almost by magic."

Dr Tompkins says:

"Television advertising gets us to accept nonsense and leads us to go looking for a fantasy world."

"…The FCC (Federal Communications Commission) was ticked off by the House and Senate Appropriation Committee and told to report on fresh measures to curb video violence or face 'punitive action'."

Mr Tindall, Director of the Audio-Visual Centre of Sydney Teachers' College said:

"Children were learning that violence is not only rampant but frequently justified."

"For years, people have been saying the good thing about TV was that it brought news to the living room. But the survey indicated that few children, if given the option, watched the news or current affairs."

"An almost unbelievable avalanche of sex, perversion, pornography, blue films, sadism, masochism, bestiality, murder, rape and brutality has flooded into the public view through the modern "boob tube' of television, or the movies and lurid novels."

"In British television, almost unbelievable references to lewdness, perverted sex and depravity are as open and unabashed as news reports."

Tomorrow's World, August 1971

Television and Time

Television undoubtedly dominates the free time or leisure of millions who have become addicted to it. Hours of precious time are daily squandered in the presence of the TV set. This malady of wasting hours daily doing "justice to the TV screen" is so serious that even necessary and important work and activities are neglected, especially when the TV program or serial clashes with the time when a particular work has to be done. The Eastern Province Herald, dated 23rd October, 1975, states in a report"

"Briton spend more time watching the television than with radio, books, theatre and newspaper combined."

"The average person watches television nine hours and six minutes a week in winter and seven hours 42 minutes in summer – but these estimates seem conservative.

"Three-quarters of homes in one British Midlands industrial area were found to have the 'telly' on the entire evening everyday and in one national survey many young viewers claimed to watch for up to 46 hours a week.

"When early in 1974 the Government put a 10:30 pm curfew on television to save electricity for several weeks the outcries were loud and long."

A recent survey conducted by the Audio-Visual Centre of Sydney Teachers' College (Australia) revealed that the average child watched over 21 hours of TV a week. Mr Tindall, Director of the Centre asked"

"What does TV offer the child in exchange for about 1,100 hours of almost undivided attention each year?"

Time in Islam is of great importance. So important indeed is time that Almighty Allah in the Qur'an takes an Oath by Time, and says:

"Wal-Asri…" – By the Token of Time
[Qur'an Al-'Asr 103:1]

A Muslim is not permitted to waste time, more so, when the wasting of time is a result of an institution portraying vice and evil, and when the wasting of time on a practice or 'past-time' involves interference or neglect with ones duties to Allah and man. The addictive grip of television over its viewers is so powerful that the viewer becomes a helpless victim wasting sacred hours glued to the TV screen, thus neglecting his Salaat, his family duties and his social duties. The student, undoubtedly neglects his studies and learning. In a survey, teachers have said that a direct link exists between television and the failing standard of literacy, particularly among lethargic children continually sitting up late in front of the "goggle box".

"By the Time Verily! Man is in loss, Except those who believe (in Islamic Monotheism)
and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the truth,
and recommend one another to patience."
[Qur'an Al-'Asr 103:1-3]

Should Anyone Be Watching Television?

Footnotes

1 This appendix is a summary, with slight changes, of an excellent and enlightening book entitled Television and the Institution of Photography or Picture-Making, published by the Majlis al-Ulama, of South Africa.

2 For an interesting and comprehensive discussion of the technical functioning of Television, refer to the original book, Television and the Institution of Photography or Picture-Making.

3 For further details and full discussion of the evidences concerning the prohibition of Music in Islam, refer to: The Islamic Ruling of Music and Singing, by Abu Bilal Mustafah al-Kanadi.

4 Ibn Maajah, al-Bayhaqee 10/221, no. 20989. Al-Albaanee declared it to be authentic in Silsilat Saheehah 1/136-139, no. 90.

5 Ad-Durru al-Manthoor, by As-Suyootee 5/307-308, explanation of verse 31:6 of the Qur'an.

6 At-Tirmidhee. It was declared authentic by al-Albaanee is Saheeh Sunan at-Tirmidhee 1/343 no. 1189.

7 Muslim 4/1375, no. 6309

8 Muslim 4/1397, no. 6421, 6422

9 At-Tirmidhee. It was declared authentic by al-Albaanee in Saheeh Sunan at-Tirmidhee, 2/195, no. 2094 [1634].

10 Ibn Maajah. It was declared authentic by al-Albaanee in Saheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah 2/132, no. 2267 [2811]. See also Silsilah Saheehah 1/562, no. 315.

11 Muslim 4/1222, no.5612

Monday 12 July 2010

Niqab and Vitamin D

Are you getting enough of vitamin D?

By Nabeelah Um Nadeem

As a Muslim woman who wears the Niqab (face-veil, headscarf, and jilbab), and after much research on the subject, I wish to increase awareness amongst sisters to take precaution in preventing vitamin-D deficiency. We may be at a slightly higher risk than others due to the lack of sun exposure because of the way we dress and due to the fact that many of us may rarely leave our homes.
People who are mostly susceptible are those who stay indoors most of the time, wear sunscreen constantly, who are vegetarians who cut out all forms of meat including fish, or live in a location that lacks sufficient sunlight sometimes up to 6 months during the winter months.
Vitamin D keeps our bones strong, helps to prevent some cancers and benefits the immune system. Preliminary research suggests it may reduce the risks of breast, prostate and colon cancer. This vitamin is a hormone and is manufactured in the body. It helps the body utilize calcium and phosphorous and builds bones and teeth.
Your body can only make vitamin D under the proper conditions. It actually does not take much to do so and will not compromise our lifestyles.
It is recommended that you try to find a secluded place outdoors so that you can expose your face and hands to direct sunlight for 10 to 15 minutes only 2 or 3 times a week. (Remember too much sun is not good either and overexposure can lead to skin cancer).
You will most likely manufacture enough Vitamin D to meet your needs and because it is a fat-soluble vitamin, you can store enough to supply you for days even months without sun exposure (according to many health specialists and Bill Sardi a health journalist and consumer advocate in CA).
It is also advised to take a daily multi-nutrient that contains at least 400IU of vitamin D3 (look for the word “cholecalciferol” on the label). Try and consume more vitamin D-rich foods like fish (salmon, sardines and tuna), fish oils, eggs, liver, milk, bran cereals and butter (avoid using margarine, it’s liquefied plastic).
In doing this your skin, nerves, heart, hormonal system, bones, teeth and joints will benefit. This also helps minimize bone loss, leading to osteoporosis. Studies have also shown that consistent weight-bearing exercise also increases bone density such as jogging, walking, and weight-training (i.e. treadmill’s are great!).
Rickets and Osteomalacia (adult form of rickets) is also caused by a lack of vitamin D in the body. This is when the bones become increasingly soft making them brittle and more flexible causing deformity to the body. Symptoms can include pain in the limbs, spine, throat, and pelvis also amenia and progressive weakness.
Vitamin D is formed in the skin by the action of short-wave ultra-violet light. Precursors of vitamin D in the skin are converted into cholecalciferol, a weak form of vitamin D3, which is then transported to the liver and kidneys where enzymes convert it to 1,25 dihydroxycholecalciferol, the more potent form of vitamin D3. Vitamin D precursors require cholesterol for conversion into the hormone-vitamin.
Without adequate sun exposure, vitamin D precursors turn to cholesterol instead of the vitamin. Fat-soluble vitamin D supplements are available. Vitamin D3 is believed to exhibit the most potent cancer-inhibiting properties and is the preferred form of the vitamin. Evidence of vitamin D’s protective effect against cancer is compelling and it may also go beyond cancer prevention and provide tumour therapy.
Much has been made of pharmaceutical angiogenesis inhibitors- agents that help inhibit the growth of new, undesirable blood vessels that tumours require for nutrient supply and growth.
Laboratory tests have shown vitamin D to be a potent angiogenesis inhibitor. Vitamin D also works at another stage of cancer development.
Tumour cells are young, immortal cells that never grow up, mature and die off. Because vitamin D derivatives have been shown to promote normal cell growth and maturation, drug companies are attempting to engineer patentable forms of vitamin D for anti-cancer therapy.
So my dear sisters, it does not require a whole lot to avoid vitamin-D deficiency. Only a small amount of sunlight and/or vitamin D supplements are required. If you do not have the convenience of you own privacy fenced-in yard, try to find a secluded place to expose only your face and hands for about 15 minutes such as a park for example, where no one else can see you. Choose the least busiest time to go.
You do not have to compromise the wearing of Niqab in doing so sisters. Remember, even sisters who do not wear Niqab who live in locations such as Canada and Alaska where they must work indoors most of the day and there is little sunlight should take these extra precautions. – Islamway

Best Answer Ever About Polygyny in Islam

Friday 18 June 2010

By Sumayyah Meehan


It is 7:00 on a Friday night and I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror I am so arduously polishing. I am stunned into silence. It is hard to believe that I am looking at my own image; I barely recognize myself. My hair is precariously perched on top of my head, and there are strands coming out in every direction. The skin on my face looks sallow and is absolutely parched. My clothes are wrinkled and I smell sweaty.

What happened to me? I was once a model of perfect grooming and was a stickler for looking my best at all times. How could I have grown so careless?

It took me several days of reflection and self-discovery to come up with an answer. I had been neglecting myself for a very long time. Ever since my children were born, I had let the rigors of being a wife and a mother take precedence over my own needs.


Islam explicitly states that we should strive to look our best at all times. I did meet the requirements of cleanliness according to my faith. However, I overlooked small details such as making sure my clothes were properly ironed. I rarely redid my hair aside from the regular morning brush, twist, and clip. I knew that things had to change, not only for myself, but for my husband as well. After all, he has to look at me every day. I had to be as pleasing as I could to his eyes.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said

After fear of God, a believer gains nothing better for him than a good wife who obeys him if he gives her a command, pleases him if he looks at her, is true to him if he adjures her to do something, and is sincere towards him regarding her person and his property if he is absent. (Ibn Majah)

Fitting Me Into My Schedule

Thus, I began a course of action that started with a revamping of my daily schedule. Rather than being a workhorse all day long, I tried to slow down a bit. I started allocating "me" time for myself each day. It was hard at first because I love my family so dearly and relish the task of fulfilling their needs. Slowly, I started to allocate a few minutes for me each day and then let it grow from there. Eventually I got up to a whopping 30 minutes of free time each day.

I began to iron at least two outfits each day; that way I had something spare to wear if something oozed on me, which is a common occurrence in my household. I also experimented with some housewife-friendly hairstyles that would remain sturdy throughout my day of salah, cooking, and cleaning. I found that a simple braid did the trick and immediately ended the chronic bad hair I had grown accustomed to for so long. I began scheduling in time for regular facials (done by me at home) each week.

My attitude began to change as my path to reinvention progressed. I became consciously aware of not only my image, but also the way I am perceived by family members.

The Make-Over

However, the battle was only half won. The biggest obstacle was still ahead of me — makeup! It may sound silly to you, dear reader, but I had all but forgotten how to apply makeup. Prior to becoming a mother, I could put a face on in five minutes flat. Now, I can do it in little over half an hour. I decided to research this issue of makeup on the Internet. I was hopeful and optimistic that I would find a few "magical" techniques to accentuate my lips and my eyes.

I was not picky, I just wanted something to jumpstart my darling husband's heart when he saw me. The first and only website I visited looked remarkable to me. It had all the parts of the face divided into categories, and in each category there was a model along with numerous techniques. I could barely control my excitement!

It took me at least 15 minutes to realize how big the models' faces were and at least another 10 minutes to discover that I had been sifting through a transgender website! Astaghfirullah. I was so embarrassed and immediately shut down my computer. So much for that. I grabbed my makeup box and began experimenting on how to enhance my beauty with makeup.

Well-equipped, I decided to embark on the final voyage of my new identity. I scheduled a "date" with my husband. It was to be on the following Friday. I spent all week getting caught up on my household chores and when Friday came around, I put the kids to bed early. I needed peace and quiet so that I could concentrate on getting ready, which takes me longer at my age. There are more lines and creases to camouflage. Once I got started, there was no stopping. I was very satisfied with the finished product.

A Rekindled Romance

When my husband arrived home, he was dumbstruck. The poor man was speechless. The polished and sophisticated woman he had married was back (for at least one night anyway). He must have missed her because he locked me in a huge embrace. His perception of me changed that night. He stopped looking at me exclusively as the family caregiver and saw me as a woman. I think we had both gotten ourselves into a rut when it came to fulfilling each other's needs. We had been so wrapped up in our obligations to Allah and to our children that we had forgotten about our duty to each other.

[They are an apparel for you and you are an apparel for them.] (Al-Baqarah 2:187)

[And one of his signs is that He created mates for you from yourselves that you may find rest in them, and He put between you love and compassion; most surely there are signs in this for a people who reflect.] (Ar-Rum 30:21)

My husband morphed into the newlywed husband he had been long ago. He was openly loving, and he kept stealing bashful glances at me while we ate dinner. And I was a nervous wreck. My hands were shaking and I could barely swallow a bite of food. No one would have guessed that we had been married for 8 years by the way we were behaving!

The simple act of dressing up for my husband had reawakened both of our senses. It relit a spark in our marriage that had started to dim several years ago. The romance that had been eluding us ever since we became parents came flooding back. It was amazing.

Date night, as we have come to term it, is now a regular ritual that my husband and I perform at least once a week without ever leaving the confines of our home. And now my husband gets ready too. He gets a haircut or buys a new shirt. It has worked wonders for our marriage and it has helped us to be better mates, al-hamdu lillah.



Read more: http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?c=Article_C&cid=1157279528981&pagename=Zone-English-Family%2FFYELayout#ixzz0rFzFXb8X


Wednesday 2 June 2010

Are You an Opressed Woman?

Keep on reading to find out :)

Taken from muslimconverts.com

In the Name of Allah, most Compassionate, most Merciful

Categories of Oppressed Women

Categories of Oppressed Women - Where's all the hue and cry? Where is the condemnation of the oppressors? Where are women's rights organizations?
Afghan women during the Soviet era:
Centuries-old Afghan traditions were violated and modest Muslim women were exploited in offices; dancers and prostitutes were imported from the Soviet Union to “train” the Muslim women, who were then expected to join this “liberation”. During the years of war, the worst atrocities were committed against Muslim women. In one widely reported incident (details here taken from an eye-witness account of the Afghan Jihad, “The Lord’s Remarkable Slaves” (Urdu) by Mufti Rafi Usmani), six Russian helicopter gunships abducted a number of Muslim girls from a village. Hours later, these helicopters returned. Hovering over the village, they started to first throw down the clothes of these girls piece by piece, then from hundreds of feet above, they threw down their unclothed bodies covered with signs of brutal torture. Some of these girls were still alive when they were thrown down, but died very soon after. It is reported that in many cases, mothers suffered heart-failure and could not survive witnessing such brutality. This incident is but one example of many others -- some documented, and most of them (due to modesty reasons) not documented by the dignified Afghanis. It was the Muslim men such as the Taliban, who, with the help of Allah, fought against the Russian barbarians and truly liberated the women of Afghanistan. Again we ask: where is the condemnation of Russia? Where were these so-called women’s rights organizations then, who are so very concerned about women now—now that women are well-treated and protected under the merciful Taliban regime? Where were the western “champions of human rights” when the heroes of Islam (people who comprise the Taliban) were giving everything—even their lives—in order to protect and liberate these women?

Afghani women in the Pre-Taliban years:

Afghani women in the areas dominated by the Northern Alliance: Further, their concerns seem to be only limited to the Taliban-controlled areas, where by the grace of Allah, peace has been restored. It should be further noted that in the areas where the Northern Alliance is dominant, rape and other violations against women are prevalent even today (REFERENCE), as well as the burqah and other restrictions.

Afghan women under the present American/Northern Alliance rule:

Women’s life is not safe, nor is there honor, nor their property. Their homes have been bombed, their children killed, their husbands shot -- everything has been taken away from them by the American terrorists and their collaborators in the Northern Alliance. Thousands of women sit today under the open sky in the bare cold with nothing except Allah keeping them alive...But this is not the end of the story. The cities lost by the Taliban are witnessing a rise in crime not seen in history -- in Mazar-i-Shareef alone, there were confirmed reports of more than 150 cases of rape in only three days!! (weekly Dharb-i-Momin, Dec. 2, 2001). What rights have these so-called “champions of women’s rights” restored to the Afghan women now that they have taken the cities from the Taliban?
Have the feminists all gone deaf and dumb and blind in the face of these flagrant violations of basic human rights?!

Western women at work:

Working women in the west are routinely subject to high stress-levels, psychiatric problems, harassment, abuse, discrimination, and related marital problems. Despite suffering all these hardships, they are still denied equal pay. Such women are prone to suffer from high stress-levels, psychiatric problems, harassment and abuse, as well as discrimination. More and more western women are finding out that they are happier to be stay-at-home mothers instead. Such is the fitrah that Allah had ordained in Islam for women, and this ideal was promoted by the Taliban in the Afghan society, at the same time allowing women who do work to have jobs that do not go against their feminine nature.

Western women in bars and night-clubs:

It is not uncommon for women in night-clubs to be made drunk and then exploited by their boyfriends, and even in cases, gang-raped by multiple men. Most women don’t even clearly remember what happened to them the night before, but many have to bear the consequences of such behavior for a long time to come - in terms of pregnancy, sexually-transmitted diseases, marital problems (for those married), and a sense of inferiority and humiliation at their being “used” and “discarded.”
The neighbors of a certain woman in America report something that should awaken those who think that boyfriends, bars, and night-clubs give women “freedom”. This woman had a four-year-old daughter and lived with her boyfriend on the second floor of an apartment building. She was known as frequent visitor to a certain “adult” nightclub. She would usually return after 2 am, sometimes heavy on alcohol, or perhaps other drugs as well. Most of the time, her boyfriend would not let her in the apartment, and yell abuses at her instead. She, in turn, would be heard yelling and screaming and throwing things at her balcony, begging him to let her in, but to no avail, other than irritating some sleepless neighbors. Sometimes she would end up spending the night outside -- even in the extreme cold winters. Eventually, when she would finally be let in, many times arguments and even physical fights would ensue, to the point where the police would be called in, would “arrest” her boyfriend for abuse, only to return him unscathed after a few hours. The little four-year-old would suffer the most. A very beautiful child, but, sadly, not growing up to be a normal individual, given the conditions she was living through. Both her mother and father would take their anger out on her when they lost control. The woman, also very beautiful, the perfect picture of an “emancipated” woman when she would go out dressed in her mini-shorts, considered herself to be the most miserable person in the whole world, and envied her Muslim neighbors’ stable and happy marriage! This is but one of countless such cases... So much for American “freedom”!
In clubs and bars, these pitiful women are made drunk and then exploited by multiple men in order to ‘socialize’ or to earn a living as waitresses. Deceived by the low status that society puts on women, they willingly subject themselves to maltreatment. There is no honor, respect or dignity. Women in many parts of the US, as soon as they reach the age of 21 (the legal age for drinking alcohol), are expected to meet a certain 'social standard' in order to be "accepted" and that is their first step to losing their honor, dignity, and virginity. On the other hand, the dignity of women under the Taliban was guarded and protected in the way society viewed and treated women, as dictated by the Law of the land.

Women in Hollywood:

It is a well-known fact that many actresses who reach stardom in Hollywood end up having shattered lives in pursuing a fake idea of success. Hollywood actresses have been known to commit suicide or make suicide attempts and suffer from numerous other problems such as family break-ups and be seen as sex-objects for the rest of their lives.
Marilyn Monroe (who killed herself by drug overdose) was quoted to have said, “[Hollywood is] a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.”
Judy Garland, a singer, dancer and an actor died in 1969 in her bathroom after being overdosed with sleeping pills. She was young and talented. As her frequent costar and friend, Mickey Roony stated, "She didn't die. She just wore out." How shameful.
Carol Landis, who suffered tremendously from stress and depression after two failing marriages and in pursuit of fame, ended her life by overdosing herself. How oppressed she must have been.
Florence Lawrence had fame, fortune and company. But after a back injury, she was no longer able to successfully participate in her acting career, and hence lost her popularity. After 271 movies, four husbands and her lost of fame, Florence killed herself by mixing ant paste with cough medicine and drinking it. Was this 'liberation'?
A woman who's purpose of life lies in beautifying oneself, exposing the beauty, acquiring fame and running after the riches of this world, is a woman who lives for this temporary world. So when these things are taken away or lost, their purpose of life, their goals and dreams are shattered resulting in the women to believe that there is no longer a 'need' to live. To become an undue slave to one's lowly desires and the hunger for this world, is the worst form of oppression because not only do they lose in this life, but they are also amongst the losers in the Hereafter.

Women pop-stars:

So many of them turn to drugs and commit suicide. If they were not utterly miserable, why would they resort to suicide? As the years go by and their beauty and singing talents start to fade away, they become even more pressured to meet the expectations of their fans. Instead of living the last years of their lives in happiness and success as they had wished for, these women end up realizing that the years of fame and fortune as pop-stars was not worth it, and most of their lives wasted. An example is Karen Carpenter who despite her achievements as a famous singer, died after years of suffering from Anorexia nervosa (an eating disorder) as a result of living a high-profile life as a ‘role-model’ and ‘symbol’ of American culture

Women Models:

A French 'model' named Fabian said "Fashion houses made me into a mannequin, a wooden idol. The mission: to manipulate hearts and alter minds. I learnt how to be worthless, nothing on the inside, cold. We lived in a world of filth in all that filth means." Under the Taliban, women were not treated as objects of advertisements – their honor and chastity are guarded from the manipulations of men.

Homeless women in the West:

In 1999, there were 2 300 000 homeless nationwide. 85% of homeless families are headed by single mothers with children under age 6. Countless stories abound in homeless newspapers and general media of the miserable plight of Western homeless women
. Almost every issue of any of these newspapers will reveal heart-rending tales of how these women are abused, battered, gang-raped, and thrown out like banana peels, to be further stepped on by others and later trashed. The author of this article personally interviewed a blind old homeless woman, who told her how every night she is gang-raped, and nobody, not the police, not anyone else, comes to help her! One wonders… none of the so-called “champions of women’s rights” ever saw this 70-year old white-haired Caucasian American woman selling the homeless newspaper in a crowded marketplace?! Doesn’t she have any rights in the very land that criticizes Taliban for taking measures for protecting their women's’ honor? One wonders if the West really cares about women's’ rights, or perhaps, in the more likely case, has other political motives for all the hue and cry over Afghani women. The following poem taken from Streetviews, a homeless magazine, is a mere glimpse of what life for America's thousands of homeless women is like:

SHE SLEEPS Marc D. Goldfingerfor a friend with love and heartache

She sleeps in the parka new boyfriend almost everyweek like an old dishragpassed from man to man.
She drinks to make herface puff her mind sleepdirty clothes caught inher disease.
She was a counselorwho forgot that the sicknessnever sleeps says shewants to kill herself.
She is.
Not what she wasbut hidden insideshe shrinks herselfto death.

A 1990 Ford Foundation study stated that 50 percent of homeless women and children were fleeing abuse.—Women Battering: A Major Cause of Homelessness, via the National Coalition for the Homeless.

Thanks to Allah and then to the Taliban, for providing safety to Afghanistan’s million homeless (mostly refugee) women. Remember that many of these women have been made homeless in Afghanistan (and in America) by the very powers who claim to be “the champions of women's’ rights.” Oppression of the kind western homeless women suffer is completely unheard of in Afghanistan! May Allah bless the Taliban and the Islamic Shari`ah they had enforced!

Depressed and suicidal women in America:

Depression abounds among women in Afghanistan, and there are reports of suicidal tendencies and even attempts in some cases. Given the misery of twenty years of war, compounded by the American/UN – imposed sanctions, life, in terms of extreme poverty and poor living conditions, for many Afghani women is unbearable. So depression there can be understood. However, America — one of the richest countries of the world, has 12 million women who experience depression every year (
. That’s shocking! But what’s even more shocking is how the society (men in particular) are encouraging these women on the verge of suicide to “do it, bXXch!” yes, that’s true! As reported in USA Today, on Thursday August 30, 2001, in Seattle WA, a 26-year-old woman distraught over a broken ‘love’ relationship, held up morning traffic on a high bridge over a lake, threatening to jump over the bridge and commit suicide. Motorists passing by, instead of helping her, whistled at her, yelling obscenities of the worst kind at her, encouraging her to jump off, while using words so derogatory that we are unable to repeat them here. Result: she jumped off the bridge! So much is the care for women's’ rights and their lives in this country! One may argue that incidents such as this are not to be generalized. True, but the fact that it happened, where not one, but many motorists yelled obscenities at the suicidal woman – right under the noses of the police, tells something about the prevalent mentality that simply surfaced through this incident. Surely, under the Taliban regime, depressed women can never even imagine receiving such derogatory treatment by the Muslim men of Afghanistan – not even in isolated cases – never while Shari`ah is enforced! On contrary the family unit is structured in such a way so that the family provides support and care for women who may be depressed or undergoing other forms of hardships and health conditions.

Teenage girls in the west and the many problems associated with their condition:
pregnancy outside of marriage:

"In the U.S., approximately 1 million teenage girls become pregnant every year." (
sexual abuse:
"Approximately one in five female high school students (20.2 percent in 1997 and 18.0 in 1999) reports being physically or sexually abused by a dating partner." ( )
smoking:
"Women now account for 39 percent of all smoking-related deaths each year in the United States, a proportion that has more than doubled since 1965, according to a report on women and smoking released today by Surgeon General David Satcher. The report concludes that the increased likelihood of lung cancer, cardiovascular disease, and reproductive health problems among female smokers makes tobacco use a serious women's health issue."

Female college students in the West:

"Students on some college campuses use alcohol to signify their emerging adulthood, to enhance social gatherings, and to cope with stress. As studies have revealed the extent of excessive or problem drinking, however, college administrators have become increasingly concerned about understanding and controlling alcohol use and abuse."
Not an uncommon sight: heart-broken and depressed because their boyfriend number five also “dumped” them! Facing the stress of academics, working part-time (or full-time), and of dressing up even to go to class, so they can look good and “sexy” for the men to see them.
"The greatest influence on college students' drinking is their peers. As Shore and Rivers (1985) point out, variables related to influences prior to college, i.e., family, religion and parental alcohol consumption, do not appear to be highly related to RPD (resistance to pressure to drink), but variables within the college environment, such as class standing and living unit, seem to correlate with RDP. Shore and Rivers suggest that perhaps students view college as a "time out" from the "real world," with its own rules and expectations, and look to the college world for guidance and standards.
Explanations for increases in drinking or acceptance of problem drinking include broadbased changes in American society--roles of women, alternative life styles, and intergroup relations (Engs and Hanson, 1985)."

Women alcoholics and drug-addicts in the West:

"It is estimated that of the 15.1 million alcohol-abusing or alcohol-dependent individuals in the United States, approximately 4.6 million (nearly one-third) are women."
"The study by the Sentencing Project, a private group dedicated to finding alternatives to imprisonment, found that the drug war has had a "dramatic and disproportionate impact on women." The report further noted that two-thirds of incarcerated women have children under age 18.
According to the study, the number of women in state prisons for drug offenses increased from 2,400 in 1986 to 23,700 in 1996. For non-drug crimes, the number of women in prison more than doubled, from 17,200 to 39,400, showing that drug crimes accounted for half of the overall increase of women in state prisons.
"Thus, women's incarceration results in a disruption of children's living situation as well as creating emotional stress for both women and their children," the report said."
Body Image:
"The media plays a big part. Surrounded by thin models and TV stars, teenage girls are taught to achieve an impossible goal. As a result, many teenage girls intensely dislike their bodies and can tell you down to the minutest detail what’s wrong with it. Most teens watch an average of 22 hours of TV a week and are deluged with images of fat-free bodies in the pages of health, fashion and teen magazines. The "standard" is impossible to achieve. A female should look like, and have the same dimensions as Barbie, and a male should look like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Buff Baywatch lifeguards, the well-toned abs of any cast member of Melrose Place or Friends, and music-video queens don’t help.
Take a look at the 10 most popular magazines on the newspaper racks. The women and men on the covers represent about .03 percent of the population. The other 99.97% don’t have a chance to compete, much less measure up. Don’t forget it’s a career with these people. They’re pros. Many have had major body make-overs and have a full-time personal trainer. Most ads are reproduced, airbrushed or changed by computer. Body parts can be changed at will.
The images of men and women in ads today do not promote self esteem or positive self image. They’re intended to sell products. In the U.S. billions of dollars are spent by consumers who pursue the perfect body. The message "thin is in" is sold thousands of times a day through TV, movies, magazines, billboards, newspapers and songs. Advertising conveys the message "You’re not O.K. Here’s what you need to do to fix what’s wrong." Girls and boys believe it and react to it. In a 1997 Body Image Survey, both girls and boys reported that "very thin or muscular models" made them feel insecure about themselves.
Western society places a high value upon appearance. Self-worth is enhanced for those who are judged attractive. Those who are deemed unattractive can feel at a disadvantage. The message from the media, fashion and our peers can create a longing- a longing to win the approval of our culture and fit in at any cost. And that can be disastrous to our self esteem."
Is it not oppression when the society forces a woman to pursue an impossible image of "perfection" which requires the woman to maintain a certain weight (which leads to health problems) and wear certain types of obscene clothes (which leads to societal problems) and act in a certain degrading manner (which causes emotional and physical harm to the woman)?
Women who have eating disorders in places where food is abundant:
In a society that focuses excessively on outward beauty, women have to be thin, beautiful and attractive to be accepted. Although Allah had provided these societies with lots of food, the women ironically choose to withhold themselves from eating (and sometimes starving to death) as they are oppressed to think that women’s honor and success lies in the way they physically present themselves to society. For the Afghan women, physical beauty remains as something subjective and not restricted to a certain definition. This is supported by the society not given the permission to witness the physical beauty of women in public, saving it from public scrutiny and criticism, at least during the Taliban rule.
"There is a strong relationship between eating disorders and depression, and one out of every three depressed people suffer from some from of substance abuse or dependence."
Women in Western Feminist Movements and others who are influenced by them:
These women are oppressed because they are trying to bring ‘justice’ and ‘equality’ for women around the world based on their limited and faulty understanding of justice and equality. Hence, their efforts actually bring more harm towards women as what they are striving for is actually not in the best interest of womankind. In truth, only the Creator knows that which is best for His creations and He has dictated this in His Perfect Religion – Islam. Afghan women were governed by Islam in Afghanistan and they were given true justice and equality at the hands of the Taliban.

Women who cover their hair but leave the rest of their bodies uncovered:

Such women think that hijab is just about covering the hair. They are oppressed to think they are obeying Allah and His Messenger SAW by the people around them who tell them hijab is just covering the hair. Hence they would not attain the reward of being obedient towards Allah in the matter of women’s dress in Islam, as the Afghan women would, insha'Allah if their intention is sincerely for Allah.
Women in India:
Women in India are oppressed in a variety of ways in their societies. Because of the very low status that women have especially among those who are of lower castes, there have been increasing cases of female infanticide in India. Unlike in Islam, Hindu parents are expected to pay the dowries for their daughters when they get married instead of the husband, and this adds to the loathing of having daughters. As wives too, Indian women suffer from marital violence at the hands of their husbands at a considerably high scale and often abuse by their own families when women become divorcees. When the Taliban came into power, laws were implemented to prohibit honor killings of women and those proven to commit such crimes were punished severely. Women were given the right to choose their own husbands, and no longer treated as property exchanged among warlords. As a result, such despicable treatments of women were decreased to almost zero cases and women were given back their dignity and high status in society.
"NEW DELHI, India (CNN) -- In parts of India, husbands regard their wives as property that apparently can be disposed of at will. Indian police say that every year they receive more than 2,500 reports of bride-burning -- a form of domestic abuse often disguised as an accident or suicide. These women are burned to death over wealth -- because their husbands or in-laws are unhappy with the size of the dowry that accompanied them into the marriage. The number such cases reported to police is rising, due either to an increase in the number of burnings or to more willingness by victims to report them. And should the woman survive, the toll is heavy.
Three years ago, Sunita Bhargava was married with children -- and, she said, emotionally abused by her husband and mother-in-law. "My mother-in-law used to say that my husband was too educated for me, that he didn't get a fair dowry," said Bhargava, who now lives alone in a New Delhi slum. The emotional abuse eventually turned physical, she said, when her husband and his mother scalded her with boiling water. Desperate and in pain, Bhargava dowsed herself in kerosene and set herself on fire, severely burning 40 percent of her body. "I miss my daughter and fear the evil that may befall her," she said. "Though I passed these times, somehow, to my children I am dead." --- Pacific News Service, June 16, 2000.
Why haven't the feminist and human rights organizations publicize such atrocities against these women and try to end their oppression? Why accuse the women in Afghanistan under the Taliban rule of being oppressed, when in reality they were the ones with dignity and honor and freedom to live without any fear of being burned or undergo pressures of giving dowries to their husband's family? In Islam, the women are entitled to ask for a mahr (dowry) of their choice from their husband. "Give women their dowries as a gift..." [Qur'an: Ch. 4, v. 4]. Even in the case of divorce, Allaah subhana wa ta`ala said, "...it is not lawful for you (men) to take back anything you have given to them (your wives) except when both marriage partners fear that they cannot keep to the limits set by Allah. If you fear that they cannot keep to the limits set by Allah, there is no sin on the two of them if she returns it (the dowry) in order to end the marriage. These are limits set by Allah, and so do not transgress them. Whoever transgresses the limits set by Allah is one of the oppressors." [Qur'an: Ch. 4, v. 20-21]. How beautifully Allah (Subhana wa ta`ala) has laid down the rules, making the Muslim woman to live respectably and in comfort!
How blatantly oppressive it is in the India, that the wife's family is forced to give a high dowry to the man's family and in many cases end up loosing all their wealth and property, while 'paying' the man and his family to take their daughter away! On top of that, instead of the man's family appreciating the marriage, they end up humiliating, abusing and many times, even burning the woman!!!

Women in Egypt:

Similar to Turkey, the Egyptian puppet regime practices laws that serve to please their Kaafir allies at the expense of Islam and the Muslims. One reason why women in Egypt are more oppressed than women under the Taliban rule is that female students are prohibited from covering their faces or wearing the niqab to school when they choose willingly to do so out of their strong devotion towards the religion. In fact devotion to al-Islam is now seen as 'extremism' and 'fundamentalism' whereas compromising Islamic teachings with Kafir ideologies in order to please the Kuffar is desired instead. As the Prophet sallallahu `alaihi wasallam said, "So give glad tidings to the strangers" as the time has come that Islam has returned to the strange state in which it first began. http://www.uncwil.edu/people/bergh/par246/L39HijabinCairo.htm
"After banning the niqaab more than a year ago, Mr. Bahaeddin issued a decree that would also have barred schoolgirls from wearing the hijab -- which covers the hair and neck, but not the face -- without parental approval. But the decree was challenged in court by militant lawyers. The minister was forced to withdraw it, just as this school year opened, after a ruling that said his order was an infringement on personal liberties. "If they force me to choose between going to school and wearing the hijab, I will leave school," said Margo Abdel Ghani, 16, who was wearing a brown hijab and clutching her books as she stood outside the Al-Siniyaa school in Cairo." (http://www.uncwil.edu/people/bergh/par246/L39HijabinCairo.htm)

"An 11-year-old Egyptian girl has been banned from classes at the French school in Alexandria for wearing the Islamic headscarf, the French embassy and sources close to the school said Sunday. The Lycee Champollion d'Alexandrie was enforcing secular principles in force under the French government's national education program, whether at home or abroad, the sources said.

Azza Omar Mohammed Zaki has been confined to study rooms at the school and her parents have been informed that she is not permitted to wear a headscarf, sources close to the school said. Azza Zaki had gone to class several times wearing the headscarf, which is common in Muslim-majority Egypt, since school reopened on September 5 after the summer holiday, the sources said. The school's principal is trying to resolve the problem while respecting education regulations and the interests of the child, the French embassy in Cairo added. Under a 1994 French government decree, pupils are banned from wearing or carrying any signs of a religious or political nature."
Women in China:
"When the female (infant), buried alive, is questioned -For what crime she was killed"(Quran 81:8)
No matter how poor the people of Afghanistan had become through the rough and challenging years of war and natural disasters, the Taliban had never imposed on its people to limit their children to only one per household. Women are free to give birth to as many children in Afghanistan as they want because Allah has already ordained the amount of sustenance a person will receive in his/her lifetime. Allah said: "And kill not your children for fear of poverty. We provide for them and for you."(Quran 17:31) Unfortunately for women in China, because of the One-Child policy that has been installed for years, many have resulted to killing or abandoning their own daughters for preference towards having a single male heir who according to their culture, would carry on the family name and be responsible for taking care of the parents when they get old. Allah has made infanticide haram more than 1400 years ago (when the pre-Islamic arabs were similarly killing their own daughters) as Islam came to liberate the women to the true meaning of liberation: "Surely, the killing of them (your children) is a great sin." (Quran 17:31)
Women in Turkey: (letter from 17-year-old sister imprisoned for Hijaab facing the death penalty, along with her mother and two sisters! + more)
Ironically, although 99.8% of the population of Turkey is Muslim, its secular government continues to deny the right to practice Islam among its citizens for fear of the rise of Islamic fundamentalism. Charged with trying to ‘overthrow the system’, Huda Kaya and her 3 daughters (ages 16-19) are facing the death for participating in a protest against the ban of hijab in universities and state buildings. As a result of the hijab ban, thousands of Muslim children and students are prohibited from going to school and Muslim women are fired from their jobs for wearing the hijab in government institutions. This oppression of Muslim women in Turkey further shows the hypocrisy of the west, as it remains silent in its strong support for secularism at the expense of democracy in which it claims to promote.
"In October 1998, four million protestors demonstrated in various cities in Turkey in support of female students who had been suspended from universities for refusing to remove their hijab. The police attacked thousands of the demonstrators for peacefully participating in the protests, which were staged at night. Many women and young girls were taken away.Several journalists, lecturers and students were charged with treason, and many people were tortured by the police - even youth at the mere age of 13 and 14 - and treated as if they were criminal suspects. Political prisoners and prisoners of conscience in Turkey are not allowed free and open access to their visitors; they have been forced to speak to them through a series of bars and reinforced plastic sheeting.According to IHRC Rapporteurs, various methods of torture have been used against some of the prisoners at the hands of guards, including:
· The use of electric shocks on different parts of the body, including their genitalia;· Beating prisoners while they are blindfolded;· Exposing naked prisoners to winter weather through open windows after dousing them with cold water;· Raping women, young girls and even children.
Feliz Beyaz, born in Istanbul in 1975, passed the university entrance exams in 1996 and was arrested in 1998 during demonstrations against the banning of hijab. One week after her release from jail, at half past midnight, Feliz and her friend died on an Istanbul highway after being knocked down by the secret service in a hit and run accident. This method of murder is common in Turkey.
The following story is that of a young Turkish girl who has been asked to choose between attending school and her religious beliefs:"Today, my school looks at me as [though I am] a stranger and tells me that I am a stranger. However, yesterday, I was the owner of these lands. Tomorrow? I do not know what will happen tomorrow. Will the corridors of the hospital that I have walked [through] for many times claim me again? Will the garden that I have sat for many hours of the guard nights take me to its bosom?"Our efforts to save the lives of patients, taking their blood pressure.... my friends that I have competed with to take an EGG... My heart beats that I felt when I first made an IV injection... Will they take place in my life, again?"For five years, I have attended this faculty with the excitement, which I felt the day I first wore the white clothes... I have become eager by listening to the dreams my father had about me. I have striven to see the happiness and pride in my father's eyes and to take my mother's blessing."When I saw the patient losing his life due to lack of medical care, I decided to work harder and prayed more. I prayed to Allah not to keep me away from my way and to let me be a real doctor that helps the others."But suddenly, someone said, "STOP"! You have no chance to enter here with these clothes, especially the funny thing you wear on your head. And then the doors were closed to my face roughly. The police stopped me entering my school that I had reached by the first lights of the day."My friends that I had shared the same desks for many years were able to do nothing. The professor who had been expressing his gladness about my success to the classroom was, now, at the door near the policeman. He was sorry... I could see this in his ashamed eyes. The only thing I can do was to cry out my innocence."I am really sad to see the ugly face of my elders. But I am not hopeless, I know and I believe that these days and oppressions will end somehow, someday. They will become 'memories' from the past."
Although there are many other examples of oppression against women in Turkey, another example proves the evil manifestations of a system of law that contradicts the Shari`ah of Islam. In future marriages starting January 1 2002, men will no longer be the head of the household in Turkey. To reinforce their efforts in denying the natural feminine roles women play as Allah created them, the Turkish government enacts a law to ensure the ‘total equality’ of men and women, much to the detriment of its citizens. This is a form of the ultimate oppression of women as women in Turkey are denied to be women. Instead, women are told they can never achieve equality with men if they remain in their feminine nature and that they will never be as good if they don’t take on the roles of men.

Women in Tunisia:

"In Tunisia, the situation of Muslim women is almost the same as in Turkey despite the claims of President Ben Ali about his social achievements and the improvement in the status of women in Tunisia over the last decade.In an interview with "Al-Hawadeth" Magazine in 1997, after the celebration of the 10th anniversary of the Movement of Change, President Ben Ali said, "In this respect, we are moving forward, on the basis of a complementary conception, in such a way as to safeguard the dignity of women while preserving the interests of the family and the security of society. We have been concerned to ensure an equality of opportunity between men and women and to renew legislation regulating the sphere of women."These statements were made while Muslim women wearing Islamic hijab were being banned from schools and work places across the country. Out of a total population of around nine million, there are more than 3,000 prisoners of conscience - most of whom are Islamists - and there have been dozens of deaths due to torture, and food and sleep derivation.Human rights organizations have found it increasingly difficult to carry out their activities in defense of human rights in Tunisia. The Tunisian government often targets them, accusing their public opposition to its widespread violation of human rights of being against democracy and in favor of the Islamists.PCOT defendant Iman Darwiche reported that guards incited her mental illness by torturing, choking, and spitting on her, and defecating on her personal effects. The government does not permit the media or international organizations to inspect prison conditions.The regime targets women purely for their marriages to or blood relations with Islamists. Violations against them include harassment, interrogations, dismissal from work, torture, sexual abuse and rape. Anyone, including relatives, who assists wives of prisoners or exiled political opponents is liable to prosecution.Many reports have affirmed that Security Services uses different forms of inhumane torture and degrading treatment against prisoners of conscience. The torture includes methods such as electric shock, cigarette burns, beating them with police batons, submersion of their heads in water and/or chemicals, and food and sleep derivation. Other methods of torture have been used against Islamists in prison that are hard to describe - even harder to imagine.Over the last few years, many prisoners - particularly women and children - have become mentally, psychologically and physically ill because of the cruelty and inhumanity that they have suffered at the hands of regimes who are obsessed with using their power in a conspiracy against their own people.Is this what President Ben Ali meant by "the improvement in the status of Tunisian women and the security of society?" Is this what he meant by "the equality of opportunity between men and women?" Maybe he was talking about equality of opportunity inside prisons, where all prisoners face the same methods of torture without differentiation between men and women." )
Women in Germany: (how they are made truck drivers and porters – made to do as heavy work as men, given their natural physical weakness, also utter shamelessness in that country – pornography /excessive alcohol consumption and related problems (Americans look ‘conservative’ compared to them… get proof of all the above).
Afghan Farishta in Germany by Inayatullah Kakazada

Saturday 8 May 2010

A Rape Surviver is STILL a Chaste Woman

Article taken from Niqabi's on facebook


Book 38, Number 4366:


Narrated Wa'il ibn Hujr: When a woman went out in the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him) for prayer, a man attacked her and overpowered (raped) her.


She shouted and he went off, and when a man came by, she said: That (man) did such and such to me. And when a company of the Emigrants came by, she said: That man did such and such to me. They went and seized the man whom they thought had had intercourse with her and brought him to her.


She said: Yes, this is he. Then they brought him to the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him).


When he (the Prophet) was about to pass sentence, the man who (actually) had assaulted her stood up and said: Apostle of Allah, I am the man who did it to her.


He (the Prophet) said to her: Go away, for Allah has forgiven you. But he told the man some good words (Abu Dawud said: meaning the man who was seized and wrongfully charged), and of the man who had had intercourse with her, he said: Stone him to death.


He also said: He has repented to such an extent that if the people of Medina had repented similarly, it would have been accepted from them.


Three people are being addressed in this hadith,

1. The woman who had been raped. There is no sin on her for what was done to her and therefore no punishment. She is still considered a chaste woman since she was not a participant of the deed.


2. The man who was wrongfully accused. He was given a pleasant word and sent on his way

3. The rapist. He received death. The punishment for rape is death. Also notice that he indeed repented and it was accepted, yet the punishment was still carried out.

In Islamic criminal jurisprudence, the overwhelming majority of Muslim scholars believe that there is no punishment for a woman forced to have sex. According to a Sunni hadith, the punishment for committing rape is death, there is no sin on the victim, nor is there any worldly punishment ascribed to her. Most scholars treat rape as hiraba (disorder in the land).


In Islamic military jurisprudence, classical jurists laid down severe penalties for rebels who use "stealth attacks" and "spread terror". In this category, Muslim jurists included abductions, poisoning of water wells, arson, attacks against wayfarers and travellers, assaults under the cover of night, and rape. The punishment for such crimes were severe, including death, regardless of the political convictions and religion of the perpetrator.


Don't let the ignorant lie to you, it was NOT your fault, YOU did NOT cause this, YOU did NOT ask for it and YOU are NOT the disgraced one.


It is up to you to decide what you will do in this situation. If you want to press charges or not is up to you. I personally advocate pressing charges because at the very least it creates a record for the perpetrator. IF he were to do this to another woman and she decides to take him to court it makes it more likely that he will be convicted and get a stiffer sentence. It is impossible to go around warning people of sexual predators but with a record he must register as a sex offender and it is public knowledge for whoever does a background check.


Keep all the people who have suffered through a sexual assault in your du'as because it is a daily struggle.

Thursday 6 May 2010

The Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan: Victories of Mujahideen in the Words of the Enemy

Jamadi-ul-Awwal 20, 1431 A.H, Wednesday, May 05, 2010In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.Recently Pentagon, the American ministry of defense, has released 150-pages report about the growing resistance and influence of the Afghan Mujahideen. The report says, the Kabul surrogate administration maintains its writ in 29 districts out of 121 districts -- which are of paramount strategic importance, for being key terrain for the stabilization of the country. The report reveals, the Islamic Emirate influence has been expanding unremittingly and that the Karzai government control is limited to 25% in these area. The report further says, 2009 was the most successful year for Mujahideen of the Islamic Emirate in terms of their extending influence in the country in this period. A 87% increase has been seen in overall attacks and ambushes of the Mujahideen.The Pentagon military officers-cum-analysts admit that Mujahideen’s tactics are increasing in sophistication and broadness. They are now using complicated methods. The report admits, Mujahideen would never be vanquished completely but instead efforts be made to contain them in order to prevent Karzai government from being ousted.These are the admissions and statements of a superpower, the president of which W. Bush, had said in 2001 that if we find our enemy in caves in Afghanistan, we will smoke them out and any one who chooses to confront America, in fact, digs his grave with his own hands. Today ground realities in Afghanistan indicate that the enemy and the surrogate administration are ensconced in hide-outs and besieged bases. The Mujahideen of the Islamic Emirate have a tangible presence in 80% of the country.This achievement has not become a reality out of nothing but has a solid foundation behind. The reason is that the aspirations and manifesto of the Islamic Emirate truly reflect the aspirations of the people and they are exactly alike. The people know that the Mujahideen of the Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan are protecting their Islamic, national, cultural and social values and wants. Similarly, this achievement is not the result of any coercion or economic incentives at the hand of the Mujahideen. Contrarily. The enemy has both military might and material means. In the past nine years, they have used both their military power and material incentives to achieve their target. However, ironically, they have failed.We remind the invading enemy that the reason for your failure is that you have imposed a corrupt administration on the people of Afghanistan; your have invaded the country, Afghanistan and deprived the people of their independence and national sovereignty. You have put thousands of innocent Afghans behind the bars in Guangtanamo, Bagram, Pulli-Charkhi, Kandahar and other open and secret jails. You have turned Afghanistan into the cobweb of CIA network; you carry out night raids on people’s houses and martyr defenseless Afghans, and you bombard wedding and funeral ceremonies. Your grip on the country will keep reducing unless and until you put an end to your aggression and stop torturing and martyring the miserable Afghans, and leave the land of the Afghans to the Afghans themselves.A day will certainly reach when you will have no way except escape and humiliation. Time and situation are both against you. You have to hear this with your ears opened. The more you stay in Afghanistan, the more you will lose your credibility. It is in your interest and in the interest of the whole region to pull your forces out of Afghanistan.

Tuesday 9 February 2010

Great Great Great Great

Puuuuuuuurfect :)

The Full Hijaab by Shaykh Salem al Amry

http://vimeo.com/6490795

Thursday 4 February 2010

Virtue of Sitting in the Prayer Area After the Fajr Prayer

Reposting from HMY sisters' blog


Virtue of Sitting in the Prayer Area After the Fajr Prayer

After reading these narrations, I see importance in publishing them for the general benefit.- Shaykh `Abdullah ibn `Abdur Rahman Al-Jibreen

From Anas bin Malik, may Allah be pleased with him, who said: "The Messenger of Allah, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: 'Whoever prays the morning prayer in congregation then sits remembering Allah until the sun rises, then prays two units of prayer has the reward like that of Hajj and `Umrah.'" He said, "Allah's Messenger, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: 'Complete, complete, complete (i.e. reward).'"

Related by at-Tirmidhi (2/586), Takhreej Ahmad Shakir. `Abu `Isa (at-Tirmidhi) said: This hadeeth is hasan ghareeb. Shakir said in his verification: At-Tirmidhi declared it hasan, and in its chain of narrators is Abu Dhilaal, and he has been spoken about, but the hadeeth has other supporting narrations. Al-Albani declared it hasan in Saheeh at-Tirmidhi (591) and At-Ta`leeq ar-Ragheeb (164 and 165) and Saheeh at-Targheeb (1/461) and declared it saheeh in Saheeh al-Jaami` (6346).

From supporting narrations

- From Abi Umaamah who said: "Allah's Messenger, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: 'Whoever prays the morning prayer in congregation then sits remembering Allah until he sun rises, then stands up and prays two units of prayer returns with the reward of Hajj and `Umrah.'" [Majma` uz-Zawaid of al-Haythami 10/104-105] Related by at-Tabarani and its isnad is good. Al-Albani declared it hasan in Saheeh at-Targheeb (1/464)]

- From `Abdullah bin `Aamir that Abu Umaamah and `Utbah Bin `Abd related that Allah's Messenger, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam said: "Whoever prays as-S.ubh. (i.e. fajr prayer) in congregation then sits until he prays for Allah the prayer of Dhuha has the reward like that of a haajj (pilgrim performing Hajj) and a mu`tamir (pilgrim peforming `Umrah), complete reward of his Hajj and his `Umrah." Related by at-Tabarani and declared hasan by al-Albani in Saheeh at-Targheeb (/1466) [Majma` uz-Zawaid of al-Haythami 10/104-105]

- From `Usrah who said, "I heard the Mother of believers, meaning `Aa'isha, say: 'I heard Allah's Messenger, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: 'Whoever prays fajr (or he said al-ghadaah, [transl. both referring to the morning prayer]), then sits in his place and does not speak idly with something from matters of this world and remembers Allah until he prays four units of Dhuha, he will leave his sins like the day his mother bore him, without any sin.''" [al-Mataalib al-`Aaliyah bi Zawaa'id al-Masaaneed ath-Thamaaniyah of Ibn Hajr (3/3394), takhreej: Habeeb ur-Rahman al-A`dhami. The authenticator said: "Al-Buwaysari said: 'Abu Ya`laa related it about Salat adh-Dhuha with a hasan chain.'"] Related by Abu Ya`laa and at-Tabarani related something similar to it in al-Awsat.

- From Sammaak That he asked Jaabir bin Samurah: "What did the Messenger, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, do when he prayed as-Subh (the morning prayer)." He said: "He used to sit in the Musallaa after he prayed as-Subh until the Sun rises." [Muslim, Sharh an-Nawawi: Mosques

- Virtue of sitting in the Musalla after Subh (5/171)]

- From Sahl bin Mu`aadh bin Anas al-Juhani from his father, that the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whoever sits in his prayer area (musallaa) after he completes as-Subh prayer until he prays two units of Dhuha prayer, [and] doesn't say except what is good, his sins will be forgiven even if they are more than the foam of the sea." [Abu Dawud 2/1287, takhreej ad-Da`aas]

Important Remarks

Women are included in this bounty, as indicated by the previously quoted supporting evidence and the hadeeth of Juwayriyyah - from Imam Muslim - that she used to sit in her prayer area (musallaa) when she would pray the morning prayer until adh-Dhuha.

One who sits should not pray until the Sun rises and its light spreads in the horizion, as in the hadeeth of Muslim.

One should pray four units of prayer of adh Dhuha prayer as in the hadeeth of `Aa'ishah and the hadeeth of Umaamah and `Utbah bin `Abd from at-Tabarani.

Greatness of the reward and ease of the action should not sound discouraging to us, for great rewards have been related in the two Saheehs for easy actions. Look for examples in what has been related about saying Laa ilaha il Allah and Subhan Allah.

Read precious comments related to understanding of these narrations by Shakh Mustafa Muhammad `Imarah in his notes to the book at-Targheeb wat-Tarheeb by al Mundhiri (1/298, and what comes after it).

Source: islam.com

Sunday 31 January 2010

Muslim Helps a Jew

Muslim "Happy Slappers"

Taken from :

http://www.islamawareness.net/Backbiting/happy_slapping.html

I am sure that everyone has heard of the term "Happy slapping". It is the term used to describe the phenomenon of an individual or group (of teenagers generally), slapping or striking a stranger while an accomplice films the assault using a camera phone or smart phone [1]. One would say that it has nothing to do with Muslims but it seems we are doing something similar in our everyday lives. I have constantly noticed that some Muslim brothers/sisters try to shame other Muslim brothers/sisters whenever they find an opportunity. You will see them in Islamic rallies, high streets, shopping malls, supermarkets either lecturing some other Muslim brother/sister loudly on how to do things properly or telling someone how he is going to end up in hell because his beard is not of particular length or berating one of the sisters because some of her hair is uncovered and of course she will not be able to enter paradise. These "Muslim Happy Slappers" take pride in telling off people and shaking their head in disgust at other Muslims who do not meet their criteria.
Sometime back I went to a small Muslim rally. I noticed that some of the ‘niqabi’ sisters were not talking to other sisters who were either wearing hijab or were not wearing one, but were modestly dressed. One of the non-hijabi sisters decided to break the ice by saying ‘Salaam’ to the ‘niqabi’ group, but all she got in return were angry noises, frowns and hostile glances. Out of the group of 3-4 only one returned something sounding like a ‘Salaam’. The ice was certainly broken. One of the ‘niqabis’ then started shouting at the other sisters, lecturing them on how we cannot be Muslims until we cover ourselves fully and passing judgement on the sister saying ‘Salaam’ for she will surely end up in hell for exposing her hair. The brothers not to be out done, joined in shouting at non-niqabi sisters, exclaiming loudly how they are following Islam incorrectly, and how they will never smell the fragrance of Paradise, etc.
I assure you I am not maligning the devout sisters who wear ‘niqab’. I appreciate their commitment to their faith. But people commit to their faith in different ways - they should all be appreciated and acknowledged. Nor am I saying those who do not cover should not be encouraged to wear hijab, they should, but with great humility, not with shouting, berating, lecturing and public humiliation.
I wonder why do so many Muslims quote Quran and Hadith in every discussion, but not follow them when talking to our brothers and sisters. Allah has clearly mentioned in the Quran:
"When a (courteous) greeting is offered you, meet it with a greeting still more courteous, or (at least) of equal courtesy. Allah takes careful account of all things." (Surah Nisa - 4:86)
Why do we not respond to the greetings that other Muslims extend to us? At work I have often seen that when I say ‘Salaam’ to some brother or sister, I get an inaudible and mumbled reply, as if they are ashamed to reply to someone’s ‘Salaam’ in public. It is fundamental that when a Muslim brother/sister says ‘Salaam’ to us we have to return his/her greeting in the most courteous way. If you are frowning or if you do not reply please remember that Allah is keeping a tab of this and you will be held accountable on the Day of Judgement.
It seems we Muslims always have a problem with the way other people dress, eat, walk, talk, pray, etc. As good Muslims we are not supposed to be scrutinising these things to find fault but we cannot seem to ignore small shortcomings. Probably as some people say Shaitan diverts our attention towards these futile things and influences us to pick holes so we do not spend time remembering and talking about Allah.
We must remember if we do not like something about someone or if we think that somebody is not following some Islamic tenet properly, we are supposed to let the other person know without offending them.
Allah says "Invite (all) to the Way of your Rabb (Cherisher and Sustainer) with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: for your Rabb knows best, who have strayed from His Path, and who receive guidance." (16:125)
Note that here Allah is referring to everyone and not just non-Muslims. One of the best examples of this would be the story of Hassan (rta) and Hussain (rta), the grandsons of Prophet (SAW).
One day an old pious Bedouin came to Medina. At the time of Prayers he began to make ‘wudu’ but he was making his wudu incorrectly. Hassan (rta) and Hussain (rta) saw the old man making ‘wudu’ wrong and they wanted to correct him. They didn’t want to offend him or make him feel insulted, so they came up with a plan. They went to the old man and said, "My brother and I disagree over who amongst us performs ‘wudu’ the best. Would you mind watching us make ‘wudu’, and be the judge to see which one of us indeed performs 'wudu' more correctly? Could you please correct us wherever we are wrong?" The man watched carefully trying to judge who is better. In the end he understood what was going on and said "By Allah, I did not know how to perform ‘wudu’ before this. You have both taught me how to do it correctly."
This incident has been preserved carefully in many Islamic history books as it highlights the way Muslims must behave when they want to correct someone. There are also many verses in Quran and also Hadith that touch this particular topic. For example:
Abu Hurairah (rta) narrated that the Prophet said, "A believer is friendly, and there is no good in one who is neither friendly nor is treated in a friendly way." (Tirmidhi 4995; and Ahmad)
Aishah (rta) narrated that a man asked permission to see the Prophet (saw) and the Prophet (saw) said, "He is a bad member of the tribe." When he entered, Allah’s Messenger (saw) treated jim in a frank and friendly way and spoke to him. When he departed, Aisha (rta) said, "Messenger of Allah! When he asked permission, you said: "He is a bad member of the tribe; but when he entered, you treated him in a frank and friendly way." Allah’s Messenger (saw) replied, "Aisha! Allah does not like the one who is unseemly and lewd in his language." (Abu Dawud 4774)
"Kind words and forgiving of faults are better than charity followed by injury. And Allah is Rich (Free of all wants) and He is most Forbearing." (Quran - 2:263)
"Allah does not love the utterance of evil words in public except by one who has been wronged. Allah is He Who hears and knows all things." (Quran -4:148)
‘Abdullah Bin ‘Amir (raa) narrated that the Prophet (saw) never used bad language. He used to say, "The best amongst you are those who have the best manners and character." (Bukhari 4/759 and 8/56)
My question to these "Muslim Happy Slappers" is which part of these verses or Hadith do you not understand? Please make a firm intention that the next time we see Muslim brothers with or without beard, Muslim sisters with or without Hijab, we will say ‘Salaam’ to them. If we are greeted before we greet them, then we will reply to them in more courteous way and with a smile on our face. And the next time we feel the need to correct/instruct someone, we will do so privately and humbly.
Allah rewards us for every good intention we make even if that intention does not always result in action and believe me that on the Day of Judgement we will be in need of all the rewards we can get in this life.
Before I end I would like to mention a revert brother I knew of. Having been born in a devout Catholic family John, (not his real name), was interested in learning more about other religions. He read the Quran and Alhamdulillah he embraced Islam. Since John lived in Ireland he didn’t meet any Muslims before his reversion. His experience of Islam was based on the Holy Quran and the Sunnah alone. When he moved to London he was in touch with lots of Muslims. For the first time he was living around Muslims and he loved every moment, at first.
Then some of these Muslims tried to impose their opinions on him. First there was the constant suggestion that he should grow a beard. Being a white Irish person, he did not have enough facial hair and the only thing he could grow on his face was this small "goatee". But this effort was ridiculed. Next on the list, people disapproved of his crew-cut, his hair should reach his ears they said. Then came the objection to the tie he used to wear. Some Muslims kept quoting a ‘fatwa’ saying that it is a sign for the cross so he shouldn’t wear it otherwise all his prayers, etc were futile. Then came the demand to stop wearing Muslim skullcap and start wearing the turban. Then it was the length of the trousers that were not right.
There were so many things, that John had a nervous breakdown. He had received no support, no encouragement from his fellow Muslims. During the breakdown he used to keep crying and saying that he will never enter paradise, since he simply cannot be a good Muslim. It took John a long time to recover and now he doesn’t tell anyone he is Muslim. He never goes to the Mosque (even if it's Friday) and lives in an area where there are no other Muslims.
I am not exempt from the advice I have written in this comment. May Allah forgive any mistakes I have made here and guide us all on the correct path. Allahu Alam.

[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happy_slapping

Any opinions to this article...?